James Leclaire Hits Rock Bottom and Rises Again on Self Deconstruction

Ottawa singer-songwriter James Leclaire has always had a gift for storytelling, but on Self Deconstruction, he does more than tell stories. He opens a window into his most personal and painful chapter. This is not just an album. It is a journey through heartbreak, betrayal, and the slow, unsteady rise back to wholeness.

Leclaire wrote these songs in the wake of a devastating divorce that ended a 23-year marriage. The result is his most vulnerable and emotionally exposed work to date. The opening title track sets the tone immediately with powerful lines like “I’m gonna grind my teeth right down to the nerve” and “I’m gonna curse the Lord until he listens.” These are not abstract lyrics. They come from lived experience and a place of raw emotional truth.

What follows is a series of songs that dive deeper into the fallout. Tracks like “Nothing Left to Give” and “The Anger In Me” reveal the exhaustion and rage that come with grief. Even “Victim of the Blues,” written in 2016, feels strangely prophetic now, capturing the same sense of betrayal that would later define his reality.

But Self Deconstruction is not just about sorrow. It is also about the hard work of healing. In “Flesh and Blood,” Leclaire compares his recovery to the cycles of nature and declares, “This scar is forever, but like the stars, I will sparkle and shine on.” It is one of the album’s most powerful moments, offering hope without pretending the pain was easy to move through.

The album closes with a chant-like reprise of the title track, echoing the feeling of release and resolution. It feels communal, like shared survival.

Produced by Phillip Victor Bova and featuring respected musicians like Kevin Breit, Ed Toth, John Fraser Findlay, and Mickey Raphael, the sound is warm, rich, and organic. Every note feels lived in.

Self Deconstruction is not polished pop. It is not easy listening. It is real, personal, and deeply affecting. James Leclaire does not sugarcoat the pain. He transforms it into something meaningful and unforgettable.

What was the emotional process like for you when writing Self Deconstruction compared to your earlier albums?

Well, this batch of songs was not all written to become Self Deconstruction. Some of the songs were written up to 10 years ago, and others in the last 2-3. I stepped away from music in 2015 for five years and, during that time, accumulated a bunch of material. In the last few days of 2019, I decided to go into the studio and record 21 tracks. Within the first few months of 2020, my 23-year marriage disintegrated in a flash. This shock suddenly inspired me to write another 17 tracks over the next few years. The interesting thing was that some of the songs prior to the madness felt like they were written in the past to help me cope in the present. So they worked perfectly alongside the new tracks. To answer your question, this album's emphasis on emotional pain and struggle resonated directly with my life, unlike in the past, where the pain was written from witnessing others. 

How did your experience in storytelling through animation influence the way you shaped this record?

I wouldn't say that it help shaped it, but instead, my experience in scriptwriting and storyboarding helped with the timing and wordsmithing of songwriting. But it also goes both ways as well.

"Flesh and Blood" feels like a turning point on the album. When did you know it needed to be included?

It's cool that you see it as a turning point because it is. I have overcome many obstacles in my life, and I know that mine are nothing compared to what others face, but there was a moment when I was asked to "forget" the atrocities that were committed against me. Some things you can't forget, which is what inspired the track.  "Flesh and Blood" was to remind myself that I am strong, but I also hurt and bleed.

To heal, I couldn't accept who caused these scars. I am only flesh and blood, not superhuman. That ask was too much. Two months before it was written in Feb 2021, I had just met a new woman who showed me what it was like to be truly loved and respected. She made me feel, as "Flesh and Blood" states, "Like the stars, I will sparkle and shine on." We are still together and deeply in love.

How did working with musicians like Kevin Breit and Mickey Raphael shape the sound of the album?

Both are unbelievably talented, inspiring, and friendly guys. Kevin worked on several of the 38 tracks from the recording sessions that spanned from 2020-2023. On Self Deconstruction, he only appears in "The Anger in Me."  But his slide guitar adds so much sadness and equal parts aggression, which lift the track to a whole other level. As for Mickey, he didn't play on this album, but instead, he was on my 2024 album Come On In on the track "Wild How The Year Fly By." Like Kevin, he made the song resonate even deeper.

That said, Juno Award Nominee John Fraser Finlay's electric guitar work really helped define the mood of the album. Having all the artists who wanted to be a part of my recording process and the skill of my producer, Phillip Victor Bova, sure helped show how far my songs could go. I'm so lucky to have such amazing support. 

What would you say to someone who is currently going through a painful breakup and is listening to this album for the first time?

I would tell them that it will be hard. It will be a long, drawn-out healing process. You will tear yourself apart as you try to find peace, and in doing so, you will also build yourself up into a stronger and healthier new you. But it's all on you to do so. I have been thinking of calling the next batch of songs Self Reconstruction… we'll see.

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